Chris Conidis Presents:
Opening Scene: A serene, idyllic landscape. A soft piano tune plays as a man sits cross-legged on a yoga mat, inhaling deeply. The camera zooms in on his peaceful face, but as he exhales, his tranquility turns to frustration.
Narrator (soothing voice): Have you ever felt overwhelmed by… air? Is breathing just… too much?
Cut to a montage of people struggling: a woman hyperventilates after opening a gas bill, a jogger gasps while running, a man sighs so hard it feels like he’s aging by the second.
Narrator: You’re not alone. Science says we breathe 22,000 times a day—22,000! Isn’t that… exhausting?
Uplifting music begins as The Breather™ logo—a sleek, futuristic mask—glides onto the screen.
Narrator: Introducing The Breather™: the world’s first wearable innovation designed to reduce your oxygen intake by up to 43%.
Cut to a stylish montage of people wearing The Breather™ in everyday situations: a woman in a lavender field, a man meditating on a cliffside, a corporate executive crushing a meeting—all looking calm and controlled.
Narrator: Why breathe more, when you can breathe better? With The Breather™, you’ll discover the joy of intentional inhalation.
Technical animation showing a sleek filter system with unnecessary sci-fi graphics.
Narrator: Powered by our patented AirMinimizer™ Technology, The Breather™ gently filters out excess oxygen, leaving you with a curated, artisanal airflow.
Cut to testimonials: overly happy customers holding The Breather™ in designer colors.
Testimonial #1: “Before The Breather™, I was drowning in air. Now? I feel…light. Centered. Slightly dizzy, but in a good way!”
Testimonial #2: “It’s like mindfulness… for my lungs!”
Testimonial #3: “My productivity went through the roof. I’m too calm to overthink!”
Close-up of The Breather™ product line: available in sleek, unnecessary color names like “Carbon Zen,” “Oxygen Noir,” and “Aspen Minimalist.”
Narrator: The Breather™ is more than a mask—it’s a lifestyle. Available in three tiers:
- The Breather™ Essential (For beginners)
- The Breather™ Pro (For disruptors)
- The Breather™ Luxe (For disruptors who brunch).
Scene switches to a confident Brant Evermind, standing on a stage, gazing into the camera.
Brant: “Breathe Less, Live More™ isn’t just a tagline—it’s a revolution. Join us in creating a calmer, quieter, less air-obsessed world.”
Final montage: a group of people wearing The Breather™ on a mountaintop, raising their arms to the sky. Inspirational music swells.
Narrator: Don’t let oxygen control you. Take a breath… but not too much.
Logo appears with tagline underneath. The Breather™ Breathe Less. Live More™.
Text on screen: Starting at $499.99. Waiver required. Not recommended for pregnant people, athletes, or anyone who values their lungs.
Chris Conidis is a versatile improv performer, filmmaker and writer, celebrated for his inventive blend of improv and comedy from Saint Cloud, Florida. 